Tuesday, March 11, 2008

What? Act our Age? Psft. No thank moo!

Yesterday in celebration of Beth's birthday and Chelsea and Waddy visiting we had a little shindig at Beth's house. There was delicious food, lots of vodka, looking through old year books, and fun catching up with friends.

Okay, now for the good part! I don't know if it was a result of all the vodka, or just for old times sake, but the decision was made to go decorate Mr. Bartel's cow. It had been 7 years so it was clearly time. He was our highschool science teacher and he has this life-size ceramic cow in his front yard. I'm sure Beth will post a lot more background info on this because she was always in on it in highschool. Lets just say there were multiple trips to decorate and a kidnapping of the cow as well with a real cow heart left with a ransom note. I got to participate this time because in Chelsea's words 'we're not cliquey bitches anymore' hahaha. Besides, who in their right mind puts a life size fake cow in their front yard and DOESN'T expect to have it molested a little.

Many themes were discussed, from an "It Has Risen" cow, "Hallemoojah," "Easter Cow," and a few other silly ones. We settled on "Re-moonion '08," and decided to print out pics of butts and glue our heads on the bodies. Ya, we crack ourselves up!

9:35 - Beth's printer was out of ink so her parents so graciously let us go to their house and use their printers even though they were all ready in bed. They also let us steal their SUV! I think her brother Kyle got a big kick out of all of us girls coming over tipsy and googling "butts" "naked butts" "man butts" "fat butts" "gross butts" you get the picture. He was a little worried because his mom checks his internet history so we had to promise to tell her that he wasn't some weirdo, we were.

We had a little craft-fest '08 to prepare the decorations
Here are a few of the butt pics we made. There were more, but photo bucket decided they were porn and deleted them. Which is weird, cause we tried to pick TASTEFUL butts.

Like this one. So tasteful I printed out an extra copy for myself. Er, did I say that out loud?

Yeah, those pink balloons Jaimie is holding would be our attempt at testicles. What can I say? Multiple bottles of vodka does not bring out the "classy" in us.

After the signs and balloon testes were made, and the streamers gathered, we stuffed ourselves in the car. Tyson and Jerad opted to stay home with the sleeping children. And to bail us out of jail if things went awry.
We found the house and snuck out oh-so-quietly (looking back, we weren't as quiet as we thought) and made a quick job of decorating the cow.

Once we got back in the car Beth honked and flashed the lights and we all yelled and screamed but no one came out. Except maybe a few concerned neighbors. They did turn on their lights though. Wish we were there to see the reaction in the morning!


.heidi.noelle. said...

LOL!!! I think my office co-workers think I am a bit crazy for how much I laughed throughout this entire blog...but I am ok with that :)

beth mcdermott said...

This is JUST as funny without the vodka if you ask me. The ONLY thing I'd have done differently is I would have fought harder to be the poster child of the patriotic ass. I mean, c'mon, Chelsea has ALWAYS gotten to be the hot one... if we are dreaming, I think its MY turn! ;)
Oh, and also? I think we forgot to discuss the fact that the operation was HIGHLY organized and efficient in progress. I think that was all you. Or moo. Whatever.

Tiffany Cagle said...

oh. my.
the cow has risen again.

Flo Oakes said...

Words cannot even begin to express the magnitude of the sadness I feel at having missed this event.

That cow has witnessed a lot.
A lot of...inappropriate teenage behavior, and I'm glad to see it continue into adulthood.

Hallelujah and pass the cloves.