Wednesday, October 29, 2008

My most embarrasing moment.... *ever*


Probably most of you have heard this story, but I'm sure some of you haven't. Since Jerad eluded to it in his lil Q&A sesh, I'll elaborate.

Let me preface by saying that Jerad and I have been friends for 11 years now, or 12? I loose count. Anyways, he was always the innocent, rules following, goodie-two-shoes one. I was by no means a wild child, just more daring than him.

Okay, fast forward to the year after we had graduated. I had been with my boyfriend for 3 1/2 years. His parents were out of town. You see where this is going right? (Of course you do... but that thought had NEVER crossed Jerad's mind even once even though he hung out with us all.the.time.) I had this whole night planned, candles, wine, lingerie, blah blah blah. My boyfriend worked up the street and was supposed to be coming home right after work.

Exactly 5 minutes after his shift was over, there was a knock on the door. Every one knew his parents were gone, we weren't supposed to be there, it was clearly my bf right?

Me: come in!

So, Jerad comes strolling on in... with Nick in tow... who at the time was 13. The little brother of his best friend. What! The! Eff!

Jerad (making nothing but straight eye contact): Um, did you know there were balloons outside?

Me: Uh... yes...

Nick: blatantly staring like a 13 year old boy would

Me: trying to will more clothes to appear on my body. Or lightening to strike me down.

Jerad (lots of eye contact): ...Um, I brought the mail...

Me (slowly reaching out): ... thanks...

and then they walked out.

About one minute later my boyfriend got home, having no idea what had gone on. he just saw the candles, wine, everything. He said something to me and I just burst into hysterical tears. He was confused and all I remember is him saying "What, I told you you looked nice?!?"

I tried to explain through my hysteria, and demanded that he call Jerad.

So, he did.

Him: So.. Steph is pretty upset. What happened?

Jerad: Well. I brought the mail. Thats it. I didn't see anything. *Click*

Then the worst part. We never spoke of it again. If he had teased me, I might have been able to get over it, but seriously, it was like it never happened. Except it was etched, no burned, into my memory. It was like Jesus had walked in on me. Actually I think my time line is off and we were still in high school because I remember never wanting to go back. So maybe this was the very end of our Senior year or something. No matter when the heck it was, I was mortified.

***

Fast forward 6 years. I was riding in the car with Danielle and Jerad. We are all laughing and talking about different things.

Danielle asks me "what is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?"

My heart stops. I remember how I felt. I turn around at her and glare. She knows the story. Jerad and I have still never spoke of it. She laughs as she realizes. Jerad gets confused. I sigh and look at him.

Me: remember that time in highschool?

Jerad: stares at me blankly

Me: ahh! when you and Nick...??

Jerad: ...

Me: Brought. The. Mail.

Jerad: Oh yeah.....

And we all have a little laugh.

We get to Taylor's house and Nick happened to be there. Jerad swears that he never said anything to him about our conversation in the car. The boys all go outside and are working on Taylor's truck. Danielle and I go inside and are watching a movie. Nick comes inside to get a drink. A light goes on in Danielle's head and all she says is:

"Wait, is this who was with him?"

And Nick gets this HUGE grin and goes "oh my gosh, are you talking about When Jerad and I totally walked in on you about to get it on???"

And I died again. So, I guess he didn't block it out like Jerad did.

Now that I've shared, what's your most embarrassing moment?

3 comments:

Flo Oakes said...

WOW.....I really thought mine was pretty bad...which I still think it is...but not nearly that bad.
Hahahaha.

Here's mine:
http://floakes.blogspot.com/2008/01/lessons-learned.html

liz oelker said...

i wish i would have been keeping track on how many times I can hear that story. its' a great story. and isn't my sister the greatest ;) such a butthead. I really don't have a really good most embarrassing story. i really think for me its throwing up in kristin's car after wine tasting with her sheryl and cailtin. i think what made it worse was I had eaten a bunch of different kinds of olives and so I stained her car and my clothes and caitlins new shirt. felt terrible. oh and then you know how modest I am- i started running around Kristins house half naked casue I didn't want to take a shower (or something- i can't really remember why). alright now that I jsut relived this it was pretty terrible. :)

Jules said...

I'll bet he's kicking himself now for not scooping you up then! hehehehe